Texas Governor Greg Abbott Deported to Norway

Holding a press conference in Oslo, Norway, former Texas Governor Greg Abbott slammed the operatives who uncovered and published that the fact that he was living in the United States illegally. The expose’ revealed that when his foreign student visa expired decades ago, he just stayed like many others. Abbott obtained a fake birth certificate and passport and grifted his way into politics after graduating with a degree in Animal Husbandry from Midland Texas University. His controversial political career ended in humiliation as he sat with other undocumented immigrants in an overcrowded holding facility waiting for his hearing.

Texas Attorney General, Ken Paxton, at a separate news conference in Austin, emphasized “As a state we are embarrassed that we were bamboozled by this wannabe Texan. Weasels like Abbot contaminate the good name of our great state.”  Paxton continued, “The way to get rid of illegal vermin like Abbott is to move quickly and this scumbag is no exception.”

After a perfunctory hearing on December 28, 2023, Abbott was unceremoniously escorted to the Dallas Fort Worth airport and immediately ushered aboard a commercial flight to Norway, the only country willing to accept him on a temporary basis.

Texans were aghast that Abbott, an anti-immigrant politician was actually not just an immigrant, but one that was here illegally. “You gotta be kidding me,” said Cletus Ray of El Paso. “You can’t believe anyone these days. We don’t have no room for pretenders like that here.”

Without any proper documentation, the disgraced former governor is at risk of being a man without a country. Norwegian government spokesman Karl Anders provided the steps Abbott must take if he wished to stay in Norway for longer than four weeks. “Norwegians are welcoming people, but we will deport those unable to meet our residency requirements.”

This is a developing story and will be updated as information becomes available.